It was pitch black.

“Oh no no no,” I walked right back out. “No no no. I need a lantern or a torch, something.”

“Oh,” said the ant.

I stared expectantly at the ant but he stood still. I turned to look for another ant coming with a light. There were so many single file lines of ants shuffling by quietly.

“Here.”

I turned. A new ant had walked up with a flashlight.

“Woah, you have flashlights?” I said.

The delivery ant walked away.

I turned the flashlight in my hand and examined it. It was crude, but it had what looked like a glass bulb. I continued examining its exterior. It had some tiny, foreign writing on one side. It looked just like the writing on the signs I saw at the bottom floor of the prison. I twisted it to turn it on. It hummed and vibrated then a light slowly faded in. It worked!

“Alright,” I said to the ant attending me. “I’m going in.”

I descended down the stairs and into a rather large, low ceiling room. The room seemed square shaped and had a pillar every eight feet or so. The room was empty otherwise. And on the opposite side from where I entered were stairs leading down further.

I descended. This second floor was much wider and taller, but all else was the same. The more I stepped away from the entrance, the less comfortable and courageous I became. I considered setting the book down near the second floor stairs so I could have a hand fully free. But I decided to hold it close.

I traveled across to the other side and again descended the stairs. Now this third floor was quite different. Whereas the prior two floors consisted only of stone and dust, this room had mossy green growth on the floors, walls, and in some places up the ceiling. I also heard water trickling.

But the differences didn’t end there. There were walls between the pillars here. And some walls had quite beautiful, elaborate archways with embellishments featuring flowers, bugs, and mushrooms.

I walked through the first archway and found a frog sitting on a lily floating in an indoor pond. I stared at the frog incredulously. He avoided eye contact.

“Well? Are you the anomaly?” I asked the frog.

The frog chuckled quite snarkily but did nothing more.

“Well, you’re not an ant, so, I suppose you’re not. Although I could imagine them calling you an anomalous ant.”

He jumped off his lily and into the water. I could see him just floating there beneath the water’s surface staring at me.

“I can see through the water,” I said.

He didn’t move.

“Whatever.” I walked past the pond towards the next archway. The room inside was empty, save for scraps of hay. There were quite distributing scratches on the floor and one side of the wall. But that was it for this room. So I entered the next.

This room was also empty, with no scraps, scratches, or anything at all. There was however a choice to be made. Would I go left or right? I didn’t like this. Should my questionable-quality flashlight die, I’d be fumbling back in the dark. Doing so would be much easier if there was only one way to go. I considered going back. I could also ask the ant at the top if the anomaly is slimy, green, and, well, a frog.

I decided to turn off the flashlight while I thought, to save energy. Besides, I should test now if it reliably turns off and back on now rather than later.

I stood there and thought for a time. I had to course correct my thoughts more than a few times. Questions like “Have you lost your mind only to lose it more?” came to me, or “Did you really just have a one-sided conversation with a toad?”. And then “Was it a toad or frog and why haven’t you taken the time to learn the difference?”

In the end, nothing much came from the thinking time, so I turned on my flashlight, which worked, and went left.

“I’ll always go left,” I said to myself aloud, I suppose to strengthen my memory of that decision. “Always left.”

The next room had a sour smell and many mushrooms. It was most unsettling. The smell made me wonder if the air here was poisonous. Then I thought of how there were many poisonous gasses that had no smell. I know it must seem mad, but there was something that I had in that moment I cannot put into words that gave me enough comfort to go on. And in the next room, I found a rat.

“Have you seen a toad?” asked the Rat.

“What?” I said.

“What what.”

“Are you the anomaly, or what?”

“What?”

I sighed. “Is there an ant down here?”

“Digiti? He’s on six.”

“The sixth floor down?”

“Yeah, why?”

“What’s he like?”

“I don’t know.”

“Okay, well, what’s between here and there?”

“Man, have you seen a frog or what?”

“Was it a toad or a frog?”

The rat shrugged. “You saw one?”

“Yes, just back there, in the pond.”

“Not fucking good, man.”

“Why?”

“He lives on the swamp floor, with the snake.”

“Oh for fuck’s sake, there’s a snake?”

“On floor eight.”

“Oh, thank god. I’m not going that deep.”

“Well…”

“What?”

“Well the frog is on floor three, so…”

I sighed. “What’s on floor four?”

“It’s a floor, man, what do you want from me. Oh there’s a bear.”

“A fucking bear?”

“Yeah he’s fine.”

“He’s fine?”

“What do you want me to say. He’s a bear and he’s fine.”

“Well is that it?”

“There’s maize.”

“A maze?”

“You hearing me okay?”

“Yeah, go ahead, what else?”

“A bear, maize, fruits. They have bugs on them. Hey, I’m not complaining. Don’t get me wrong. I’m just saying. And that’s about it really.”

“What’s on floor five?”

“I wouldn’t go there.”

“I have to! To get to six!”

“Well, just go fast.”

“Why?”

“There's an anteater there.”

“I'm not an ant.”

“I don't know, man,” he shook his head crossly. “I gotta go.”

“Where? Like, what are you— what is this fucking place?”

“Yeah,” he said. Then he scurried off.

I entered the next room. Another split. I went left. Always left. I ended up back at the damn pond. The frog was still there, back on his lily pad. When he saw me, he jumped back into the water.

“This is horrible and I hate it,” I said to the frog.

I walked back along the path I had gone, but I took a right during the three wait split.

“Go left unless it's a threeway, then go right,” I said to myself.

I made it to the stairs leading to the fourth floor. The floor of the bear, apparently.

This room was even larger than the third. But it wasn’t a maze as the rat had said. It was wide open. The light of my flightlight didn’t reach far. I slowly headed in the direction of the opposite corner.

I saw something up ahead laying in the ground. It was the bear. I backed away. It seemed to be sleeping. Perhaps hibernating. Maybe that's why the rat said it’s fine. Although he also said this floor was a maze.

For good measure, I veered away from the bear. And I mean veered. When I reached the far left wall, I followed it towards the far corner. But there were no stairs down. Is this the maze? I followed the wall to the next corner. I heard a buzzing sound as I approached. Bugs. I had found the fruit. The fruit was all moldy and strange, with a disgusting musty smell. I avoided that corner, and followed the wall past where I had entered the floor from to check out the final corner.

There in that corner were cornstalks so packed with corn they bent over entirely.

Could it be that the path to the fifth floor is a trap door beneath the sleeping bear? I felt as though I had looked in every other conceivable place. If it were the case, my adventure was over. I carefully approached the bear and saw that it was moving. I got closer still and saw blood beneath the bear. I stepped back, and then saw it. A green, yellow-green, and tan snake was wrapped around the bear, suffocating it to death.

Time to go.

I swiftly but quietly retreated to the stairs back up. At the stairs I saw the rat.

“What?” said the rat.

“The snake’s over there killing the bear.”

“Oh, shit,” said the rat.

“I couldn't find the stairs to the fifth floor.”

“It’s not here.”

“What do you mean it’s not here? Where is it?”

“Here, I’ll show you,” said the rat. He scurried up the stairs to floor four.

I followed, but I was just about to give this up. He took me through a few turns. I was utterly lost at this point. Finally we arrived at a dead end.

“Please tell me you aren’t lost,” I said.

The rat nodded towards a hole in the bottom of the wall.

“Why didn’t you tell me about this place! You talked about the bear and a bullshit maze and I could have skipped that entirely!”

“Look, the snake is real big threat to me. I needed to know where it was. I appreciate your help.”

“You rat.”

“Well, I'm making up for it now, aren't I? Crawl through here, it leads to a secret room. Avoid the anteater.”

“Wait. I don’t know how to get back from here. Will you come with me?”

“Oh for fuck’s sake man, I’m— You’re a grown ass man, can’t you figure this shit out?”

“I could really use the help.”

“Yeah, no. I’m sorry. I don’t like saying no. But I got shit to do while the snake is busy.”

I got down and crawled through the floor. Sure enough, it led to a secret room with especially steep and long stairs. It had to be twice as steep and five times as long as the other stairs.

I took the stairs down into what I believed to be floor five. It was a small room but with a gigantic floor height. In the center of the room was an anteater the size of a fire truck.

It rushed at me. I hurried back up the stairs out of reach. It roared and stuck its dumbass snout into the stairwell. Its tongue shot out and nearly hit me in the head. I went further back up the stairs safely out of reach and sat to catch my breath.

I heard movement from up above. I flashed my light up. I slowly walked back up the stairs, wanting nothing more than to leave this hellhole. And then I saw, at the top of the stairs, was the snake.

“Do you talk?” I asked the snake.

It coiled up and hissed, like any snake might. No communication. The fucker had a whole bear upstairs and he was still hunting.

It eased back down, low to the ground, and slowly started making his way down stairs towards me. For every step it slithered down, I took three steps down. This was bad.

The giant anteater still had his dumbass snout in the stairwell, licking around like a freak. I had long given up on the quest. And at this point, I was beginning to give up on living. It became a matter of how I preferred to die between two not-so-great options.

I was now a step away from the flapping tongue. And the snake was close enough to arch itself back up tall for its strike.

I decided I would rather die by snake than by a firetruck sized anteater. In hindsight, I think that was rather stupid, as the anteater may not have been able to kill me at all, the bumbling idiot.

But I froze and accepted my fate. And I’m glad I did. The snake lunged and I instinctively put up my hands. As I did, the book fell and bonked the snake on the head, causing it to fall to the ground.

The anteater’s tongue latched onto the snake and slurped it right up. The sound and scuffle that resulted was most bizarre. The giant anteater was having a sneeze attack and the backend of a giant snake slinging around the room. The anteater ran about screaming in sheer panic.

I watched all this unfold for far longer than I should have. Finally I came to. I ran away, up the stairs, and back into the secret room. I got down to crawl through the hole and then stopped. Oh no. The book! I had left it on the ground. I can’t return to the ants with the quest incomplete and the book lost. Shit!

I ran back down the stairs and saw that the struggle was still unfolding. The anteater had pinned down the snake against the far side wall and they were struggling with each other. The path to the stairs leading to the sixth floor was clear.

I seized the opportunity. I ran. And I made it. Floor six. It was a medium sized room. There was a ton of overgrowth, moss, mold, mushrooms, normal-sized bugs. And, in the far corner was an ant, sitting indian style, watching me.

“Are you what they call the anomaly?”

“You made it,” the anomaly said with a smile. “My name is Digiti Minimi.”

“You knew I was coming?”

“Oh yes. I’m still very much connected.” He pointed to one of her two antennas. His other antenna was shorter. Perhaps broken.

“I’m aware of the other ants, but I am not controlled by them. This is why I am the anomaly.”

“Why are you here?”

“They want me gone. They fear me. This is the one place where I can stay connected that they won’t come.”

“How did you get past that fucker up above?”

Digiti smiled. “Wanna see?”

I nodded.

He held out her hand. A single spark popped and then a flame formed just above his open palm. It curved and swirled into an orb of fiery liquid. He tossed it down the stairwell and it scattered into sparks, but of fire, and thick smoke.

“He’s afraid of fire.”

“You know magic?”

“That’s what that was,” he nodded. “So, why that book?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know. It’s mysterious.”

“That’s it?”

“Yeah. So, I wanted it, a bit. And then, when I was told I couldn’t have it, that was also mysterious. So I wanted it more. I don’t know.”

He looked at me without saying anything.

“Alright, well. I’m going back up. Would you mind doing that fire thing and walking along with me?”

He nodded.

We walked back up the stairs together. It was quiet now.

“That’s interesting,” Digiti said.

“What?” I whispered.

“He’s always at the center.”

There was a low, raspy growl from the far dark corner.

“Go,” he pushed me along towards the steps leading back up. He walked between me and the dark corner with her hand ablaze.

I was near the steps when I saw the anteater. His eyes were green and luminescent. His tongue, now swollen, green, pulsating, and veiny, was being dragged along the floor as he stumbled forward.

“Was there a snake?” Digiti shouted to me, not taking his eyes off the abomination.

“Yes,” I said.

“Leave!” he yelled.

I leaped up the stairs and ran. Digiti was close behind me. The beast chased and I could feel the breath of his snout blowing air into the stairwell, but his toxic tongue was too swollen and erratic to strike us.

Digiti and I collapsed on the floor of the secret room at the top of the stairs. We stared down the steps at the swollen toxic tongue flap around in the stairwell. The path back down was now blocked.

“What will you do?” I asked Digiti.

“I don’t know,” he said.

“There’s fruit and corn on the fourth floor,” I said.

“And a bear,” she said.

“No,” I said. “Oh no,” I whispered.

“What?”

“I saw the snake killing the bear. Does that mean…?”

“We need to get out,” he said.

We crawled through the hole and I followed Digit through the various archways. I could hear rumbling down below us. And then there was a bear’s roar.

Finally we reached the room with hay and scratch. And then the pond. The frog was gone. We found the stairs leading to floor two.

We ran across floor two to the stairs to floor one and at the top of the stairs was the rat.

“You again?” said the rat. “You found the ant.”

“We’re leaving,” I said, walking past the rat.

“Well you really fucked up the place, you know,” said the rat from behind us.

I turned. “Me? It was the snake!”

“Always the snake’s fault, huh? It was you who attracted the snake!”

“I can’t do anything about that now.”

“You can fix it!”

“How?”

“The frog. I still can’t find him.”

“Why do you need the frog?” I asked.

“He’s the anecdote.”

“Oh you gotta be kidding me.”

“You think this is the first time this shit has happened?”

“Check the pond,” I said.

“He’s not in the— man, you know he’s not in the pond. You just came from there.”

“I don’t know,” I said.

“He went up! He keeps going up.”

“I’ll look for him,” said Digiti.

“If you find him, bring him back,” said the rat.

There was a roar.

Digiti and I ran up and through the first floor, then up the final stairs, exiting the catacombs.

The sky was blue, purple, and pink. It was dawn. The air was light, the wind gentle. I felt like I hadn’t taken a fresh breath of air in an hour.

Digiti emerged reluctantly. The ant from before, who was still waiting for me, didn’t react.

“I found him. And I think I ruined the ecosystem down there,” I said.

“I’ll go,” said Digiti to the ant. “Far. Out of range. No more interference from my broken spirit. I’ll leave today.”

The ant nodded and walked away. Another ant approached me. “I’ll escort you back to your friends.”

I nodded and followed, then glanced behind. Digiti was standing there still, looking at me.

“Where will you go?” I asked.

“I don’t know. I don’t know what’s out there.”

“Come with us. We’ll get you somewhere fine. You can start your life over.”

“I need to find the frog.”

“Oh,” I turned to my escort ant. “Have you seen a frog? Have any of you seen a frog?”

“We have. It hopped through town and left through the east gate a few minutes ago.”

“Take us to it?” I asked.

“I can take you to the gate.”

We followed the ant to the opposite side of the town. Digiti and I ran outside to look for the frog. The clouds above us were angry and deep grey. Up ahead was a slow flowing river. And in that river we found the frog. He was facing us, his feet in the water.

“You have to come back,” I said to the frog.

“The snake has taken the anteater and bear,” said Digiti.

“And the rat?” the frog asked.

“The rat is okay, for now. He’s waiting for you to return.”

The frog sighed. And then he nodded.

I picked him up and we rushed back to the catacombs. We entered and crossed the first floor, ran across floor two and down into floor three. At the small pond we found the rat. I placed the frog on the lily pad.

“I'll take it from here,” said the rat. “Thank you for coming back,” he said to the frog.

The frog nodded and smiled.

Digiti and I again emerged from the catacombs. It was raining now. The escort ant was waiting and we followed him back to the hollowed out tree.

We walked past the concierge towards room two. I motioned for Digiti to be quiet and then opened the door and tiptoed in. Nessy and El were still asleep on the bed and Hamburger was sprawled out on the floor. Digiti sat on a chair and leaned back and I joined Hamburger on the floor. Sleep at last.